Archive for May, 2007


Hell in a Handbasket

I don’t think I am one to rant (much) on my blog. Sure I sometimes complain but then again don’t we all ? However, this story is just really chapping the old cheeks. Apparently it is okay for this guy to have a child, as long as it is with a girl. His legally married wife,whom he also abused on a regular basis, including punching her in the stomach while she was pregnant.Other things I learned from watching Nancy Grace( I don’t normally watch her but it was on in the employee cafeteria) on CNN is that the microwave wasn’t his first try. Yeah he also tried the room safe and then the refrigerator before he decided on the micrwave, for 10 -20 seconds.

The baby is only 2 months old, how in the world did she end up with these parents. Talk to me some more about “family values” and the ” sanctity of marriage” . While your at it explain how it is okay for these people to try and fight and get their “precious child” back. Tell me how she would most likely be traumatized by being raised by a gay or lesbian couple. How her life could no longer be normal with two dads, or two moms for that matter.Like this incident isn’t gonna traumatize her. Third degree burns on her face and left arm ( I also heard on NG). Now, I am not saying that I want to have a child at this point in my life. I would like to be able to have the option to do so if we chose to though. But we can’t. AND THEN >>>>AND THEN  to throw more wood on the fire He says he was ” sent ” by God to preach in Galveston ?? !! WTF !!!

OH and just for good measure the “wife ” is supporting the “husband”, she says she just wants her child back so THEY can continue to be a “family”. In defense of her husband she is using the old ” the devil told him to do it” . It just really really sucks knowing that people like this can have as many kids as they want, for as long as they want . While other couples, either straight and barren, or same sex couples who are trying every way available to be able to have a child, that they would love and cherish and nurture can not, that just really makes me very sad.  

 But lets continue to extol the virtues of family decreed by the “powers that be”. Hell if you can’t nuke ’em you can just throw ’em in a dumpster, or drown them , maybe even bash in their tiny skulls. Ahhhhhhh “Family values”. I think I have mentioned before, either in a post or a comment to someone, there is something inherently wrong when a child who puts his/her utmost trust in their parents can be brought to harm, sometimes even death, by the people they call mommy and daddy.

You are The Star

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised

The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you’re a dreamer, but you’re not the only one.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

The Invasion begins

Remember back in this post , when I told you it was just a matter of time before the cane spiders came a callin’ ? It seems as though the first wave made it through our barricades last night.  When I got home from work there were two of them in our living room/kitchen ceiling, one in the bathroom and of course one in the bedroom. You would think that they would be fairly easy to kill but our ceilings are (I think) 10 feet high. Usually, I can get to them if I stand on a chair and use the swiffer wet mop (sans wet pad). But these buckos were barely just outta my reach, and apparently they knew that because we weren’t scaring them.

Finally I had an epiphany. I got a dishrag and put a few ice cubes inside to give it some weight,then tied up all the corners,then just threw it at the suckers. The result was kinda like a hard bean bag (which reminds me, I need to see if I can find a bean bag somewhere) ( you know, from like that game when we were kids, Toss Across). The dishrag wrapped ice cubes did their job though. I got all of them, except for one of the guys in the bedroom. I used the vacuum to get him. I must have really been on a roll, with 2 epiphanies in one night. Although it did take just over an hour to accomplish my heroic feat.

The end result was a worry free Patrick, who was able to sleep like a baby. It really bothers him more though because he can not look up at the ceiling. He has to rely on me to tell him if there are any up there or not. So far I have not lied to him, only because I know how much he hates them. Because of the fact that they don’t bother me (as much) I am the designated “monster killer”. However, if I miss one, I am told in no uncertain terms what I could have done to “get it”.

That’s really all that is going on with me right now . Patrick is sssslllloooowwwllllyyyyy recovering. He keeps trying to do too much and then I have to nag him to stop. That’s always alot of fun, I swear he is the MOST stubborn man I know. We go back to Oahu on June 6th for his first follow-up, so we should find out how normally he is progressing afterwards. Work is finally starting to wind down for me as the banquet season ends and the family season starts,although we do still have a couple of weeks of big groups. As a matter of fact, I am about to leave work to see whether or not the second wave has begun yet. Trust me, on Maui, the work of “monster killer” is never truly done . However, Terminex comes on Tuesday!!!!! That should give me a bit of a reprieve ( one can hope).

Gather round everyone it’s story time. What story, You may ask? I will tell you. This is the story of two guys and their dog, how certain things transpired and what became of them after the transformation. Everybody comfy cozy? Okay then lets begin.

As I have mentioned already: Once upon a time there were two guys, who met, fell in love and decided to move in together (not quite as fast as the girls who like girls do, but almost as fast) ( no U-hauls are involved in the telling of this story). During their search for an apartment, they came upon a place that was very dog friendly and so after signing all appropriate paperwork the guys found themselves on the way to the pound. That is where Lola Elizabeth Moorlach met her two daddies. Lola was the name the humane society had given her, which, the two guys thought was way too cute to change. Elizabeth was the great lady at the humane society that helped the two guys and Moorlach just happens to be a combination of the guys last names….. but I digress.

Those first few months were the halcyon days of the relationships, both of which were relatively new ( the two daddies, as well as the two daddies and a dog). Days together were spent hiking, taking Lola for walks, buying her “babies” and just being proud new parents of a gorgeous new addition. When, after a hard day of work, the two daddies would come home they would cook dinner together ( in a kitchen that was way too small for two).  Then they would sit down and eat. Lola, paying no particular attention to what the two guys were doing, would be either in the bedroom or living room blissfully playing with one of her new ” babies”.

Until that fateful day, the day that changed everything, forever. What day was that you might ask? It was the day **Patrick gave Lola table scraps. ” Oh that’s quite harmless”, I can hear you saying to yourselves. But oh how wrong you would be dear readers. You see, it may seem quite harmless and in fact may even appear to be cute. At first, in the beginning, and I might even agree with you. The problem is after the beginning. There is no way to just give a dog table scraps once, as any proud dog owner will tell you. Once they have tasted of the forbidden “Human Food” they are turned. The transformation happens, not quite in the blink of an eye, but slowly and insidiously over periods of time. 

Don’t get me wrong I love my family as much as the next guy but I just hate things that creep up on you. Lola is one of the greatest dogs in the world (actually the greatest if you ask Patrick or myself). These days, however find the terrible transformation complete. Our precious little princess ( read little moocharino) has changed from a dog who never even noticed we were eating,to a dog that will come running from wherever she is in the house when she hears the refrigerator open. From a mere pup who would play with reckless abandon while we ate,to a dog who will sit and stare at one of us, until they are done eating and when one is done will move to be closer to the one that still has food. She has even gone so far as to steal a steak off of my plate while I was distracted. Once the transformation is complete they are shameless, no level is too low, nothing is safe.

The moral of this story, dear readers is BEWARE. I am sure many other dog owners have been sucked into this trap. People who have witnessed the tragedy of this transformation, perhaps more than once. Do not let those limpid puppy dog eyes trick you, indeed they are not starving just because you are eating. No matter how much those eyes tell you that they are. ” But what can we do to stop this terrible evil?”, you may ask. Tell people, spread the word. Knowledge is power and power is just what you need to avoid this trap.

                                                                                               THE END

** Patrick is well aware of the fact that I blame him. He actually knows that it is (mostly) his fault. However, I am not claiming total absolution. I too have been known to put my plate on the floor for her to “finish off”. Patrick only gets the lion’s share of the blame because he did it first.

Maui is Burning

Okay ..well not really Maui, but the cane field across the street from our house was. This morning,at 5 am,while I only had one more hour to sleep before getting ready for work, I was awakened by a very loud noise. I hate being awakened right before I have to get up, I don’t mind waking up at like 1 a.m. or 2, because then I know I will get more sleep. But being awakened at 5 when I have to get up at 6 is just nasty.  Actually I was awakened by Patrick who was startled by the loud noise. The noise itself was kinda hard to explain, sort of a mixture of popcorn popping and the crackle of a fire in a fireplace only much noisier. We pulled open the shutter and drew back the sash (not really our blinds were already opened,all we had to do was look out the window). It was really sort of beautiful to see. The dawn had just started, but all we could see was the bright orange flames licking the sky, and a huge white cloud of smoke that was quite heavy and billowing.

 We got up and threw on some shorts and went to watch it from the lanai/carport. However (and quite sadly) like most things beautiful are wont to do, it faded fairly quickly and we were just left with the smoke. Oh and cane spiders……they might not have arrived right away, but I am sure they are there now. At my house..with their 8 lil hairy stick legs sprawled out on our lawn chairs and accessories, trying to figure out how to get inside. I need to stop at Wal Mart on the way home and get some spray I guess. Patrick took a few pictures with his phone. I am going to get him to send them to my email and when he does I will post them. However I will not guarantee their quality(being as they are coming from a cell phone). I hope that at least one of them is worthy of your perusal because like I said it really was pretty. Perhaps a little less so since it happened an hour before I had to get up ( I kid).

Patrick went into the hospital on Tuesday as planned, what was not planned ( yet secretly hoped for) was his overnight stay. His surgery was begun at 7:30a.m.  and he was done by 10 a.m. his time in the recovery room however was a bit longer. He did not get up to his room until 8:30 that night.Due to a few issues going on they decided to keep him in recovery a bit longer ( he was temporarily paralyzed on his right side). By the time he was brought up to his room, he was doing fairly ok. Well enough that he wanted to go outside and get some fresh air ( he had been lying down in his bed since 5:30 that morning).

Around 10 p.m the nurse came in to give him his shot of morphine for the pain. He still kept insisting on going outside. I decided to grant him his wish and ordered a wheelchair, in which I was going to take him outside for a bit. After the wheelchair got to the room I told him to wait while I went to the bathroom. I did my “bidness” and came out to an empty room. No Patrick, just his bed, my cot and a wheelchair. Since I knew he was not in the bathroom, I began to panic, after all he had just had a shot of morphine. I ran down to the nurses station and asked the very helpful( and if you can’t smell the sarcasm from where you are there is something wrong with you) nurse if he had seen Patrick. He mumbled something to the effect of ” mnbxxnkihdsd that way dkjoxyvebj you might shjhgda gnhvdi nkkhsiyatd the elevator area.” And so I ran down to the elevator area hoping to see Patrick further down the hall. At this time I was really kinda freaking out. The hospital we were at is a huge many towered affair each with 10 floors. I waited outside of the elevator bay for a bit hoping he would come back up. I thought about going down to the lobby, but if he was on his way up we would miss each other. So, I ran around our floor checking in all the public restrooms.  I asked a couple of other nurses if they had seen a patient wandering around. They all replied in the negative. About 30 minutes passed with no sign of P, I had even rechecked in the room to see if he had come back on his own, he had not.

“Alright” I said to myself , “time to check down stairs”. I found my way to the elevators again and headed to the lobby. As I got to the ground floor I ran towards the main  lobby , and as I turned the corner to get to the door, I looked out to see Patrick and 2 security guards deep in conversation. Patrick had broken out. Literally, he broke the sliding glass panel door and was just walking around. I went out to get Patrick and bring him back to the room. When I got close enough to hear what was being said I realized the guards were being kinda rude, going on about Patrick ” breaking the door” ( it wasn’t really broken, it was working fine the next day). I calmly collected Patrick from the guards ignoring them completely, and got him back upstairs into bed, where he instantly began snoring. I looked up at the clock as he began to snore, his whole  “stroll” had taken about an hour and 30 minutes. And in his defense there was a big sign on the door that read ” Push in the case of an emergency”. I just didn’t realize how much of an emergency his “stroll” actually was, and I suppose the security guards didn’t either.

Looks Like We Made it !!!

 We have made it back home. After 3 hours in surgery and 10 hours in the recovery room I finally got to see my love. He had to stay in the recovery room longer,it seems that his right arm did get paralyzed, but only temporarily. The Dr. thinks it had something to do with the swelling around his spinal cord after the surgery.

He is still having some discomfort of course, but things look like they are right on track. We actually stayed in the hospital over night on Tuesday. His Dr. wanted him to stay on Wednesday as well, but he was so miserable that he decided to leave. We got home on Wednesday around 4 p.m. . The flight home was pretty much miserable for him because we (naturally) had the most turbulent flights I have ever had. Lola almost jumped out of her skin when we got home she ws so excited to see us, it was quite cute. It's awesome to be missed that much. Anyway I just wanted to update everyone. I do have some stories to tell about the whole excursion. Want to hear about a morphine filled Patrick wandering the halls in nothing but his lil dressing gown? Well then stay tuned. 🙂