This morning, as I was ironing my clothes for work, Patrick woke up and stumbled into the bathroom. When he came out he kissed me and said good morning. He then told me that a certain actor from a very popular TV show (which ended a couple of years ago, and had a theme song from a popular band) was a pedophile and he fed the children to his dog.

Realizing he was sleep talking again I engaged him in conversation. “Oh my God!! Does he at least kill the children before he feeds them to his dog?”, I  asked (I could be considered evil for asking this).

” No, he doesn’t kill them first he just lets the dog do it. It’s a Rottweiler. This is all too disturbing and I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” was his reply. He then lay back down and started snoring immediately.

 Later, as I was waking him to say good bye, he asked me if I had just been in the pool. I told him no, that I was leaving for work.

The best part of all of this is when I call him later today to check in with him, he will have no recollection that any of this transpired. He will then blame me for trying to make him crazy……….. I don’t think I have to try very hard.